Corrupt-a-wish

[cyberclone42]

Granted, they set their minds on destroying your home.

[Wackodude]

That non wish is non-Granted, as it is Memorial Day.

I wish we had greater understanding.

[cyberclone42]

Whoops, forgot to wish there : P

Granted, you now understand the ins and outs of your left pinkie finger. You pass this knowledge to everybody else that cares. Meaning nobody.

I wish for easy program-switching on my computer.

[Wackodude]

Granted, but you just need to install a Windows Taskbar, which apparently is impossible on your computer.

I wish for telekinesis.

[cyberclone42]

Granted, you get telekinetic powers allowing you to open cereal boxes.

I wish I could edit the OP of threads I start.

[Julian]

Granted, but so can everybody else.

I wish to kill all witches before they're created.

[cyberclone42]

Granted. Welcome to olden-days Salem.

I wish for cotton candy.

[Wackodude]

Granted. You get a lollipop made from the cotton plant.

I wish for caterpillars to eat dirt.

[cyberclone42]

Granted, they evolve into worms.

I wish for you to read this post.

[texasjoshua]

Granted

I wish I was a communist.

[cyberclone42]

Granted, your new regime is overthrown.

I wish to be hugged by balloons

[Boneheads1999]

Granted, but the balloons get over-excited and hug you so much they pop and all the air blows onto you so hard you die. Oh well.

I wish I had a sandwich.

[cyberclone42]

Granted, but the Heavy attacks you and eats it.

I wish for shoelaces.

[Ubernoob]

Granted. But they suddenly develop evil intelligence and try to strangle you while you sleep.

I wish for more time.