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Halloween has always been my favorite holiday. So, since 2011, I have spent the entire month of October every year reviewing a horror movie each day. I've changed formats many times over the years, and in the past few years, I've even been joined by my wife Solee, as well as the occasional guest. We've got text, drawings, video reviews, audio reviews... we got it all! Wanna check out our reviews? Look below, or use the menu to the left to dig deeper!
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  Belittling Horror Excessively: Shallow Ground 07:44 PM -- Sat October 11, 2014  

This is the story of a young man without any clothes save for gallons of blood, who goes traipsing through the woods to meet some new friends. He then... uh, I don't know. Stares at them mainly. Writes cryptic stuff on the walls in blood, leaks blood all over, causes people to have visions with his blood. Look, blood is his thing. He's kind of like a Terminator, but made of blood instead of liquid metal. Then there's an old lady who murders people, and a lot of really bad decisions (by the characters as well as the filmmakers).

This movie is fun. It's like an Evil Dead movie in a lot of ways, with some rather outrageous gore, and over the top stuff that doesn't bother to make a lot of sense. When it first started, based on the description, I was expecting a serial killer real-world type movie. My jaw was dropped for a while trying to re-adjust from reality to abject insanity. The movie also has some really well-done gore, despite obviously being a very tiny budget. There are these strung up corpses that are just thoroughly disgusting.

I honestly don't think this movie actually makes sense. There may be some connection between things in the writer's mind, but the end result is totally disconnected. It follows no logic I can discern, and the ultimate sign of that is the hilarious 'twist' in the last 2 seconds of the movie. It's totally out of left field and verily didst it cause me to LOL for realsies. I mean, you could come up with an explanation for what caused it, but if you do, you're a better man than the movie's writer.

Oh and the music... wow. It tries so hard. It needs to stop trying. Actually, this movie reminded me quite a bit of Pumpkinhead. It's just overwrought overserious silly fun. With foggy woods.

So, in the end, there's an actual body count of 9, in addition to a mention of 36 other bodies, and I have to give this movie just 1 out of 5 School Buses. I hate to do it, because I totally had fun, but I'm still not sure I can call it "so bad it's good". If you like bad movies though, it might be a good choice. I just can't in good conscience give it points for being so insane.

In the movie, there's an issue (which again makes no sense) of women being strung up from trees and stabbed. I didn't want to draw that, but I like drawing trees, so I put a noose on this one.
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