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  Your Real Face 11:53 AM -- Mon May 19, 2008  

Everybody knows when a telemarketer calls you, that they are bothering you. They know it as well as you do. You don't want to talk to them. I don't even know why companies use telemarketing, I guess there must be some sales made that way, and probably a lot to justify that kind of expense and ill will. But anyway, they call up and act totally obnoxious. They talk right over you, and when you very clearly say you don't want what they offer, they explain why you are wrong. For a loong time, even though at the end of their repetitive spiel, you're obviously just going to say "still no".

But when they call, I'm totally polite to them. I don't interrupt their spiel or anything, I just wait for them to actually stop, minutes later, and then say "No thanks, I'm not interested." And this just happened, but it's happened before more than once too - they hang up on me (of course, this is the second run of their spiel - their flowchart tells them to give it twice and then hang up if they are still not making headway). Once they know they aren't going to get the sale, their time is valuable. They want their commissions, so they drop you like a bad habit and go. Because saying "Alright, have a great day, goodbye!" would be too much work. No, they show their real face. They are people who hate the people they call, because day after day, they make these calls and whether the person they call shows it openly or not, the victim hates them. Everybody hates telemarketers, it's not a tricky thing to figure out. So every day they call people who hate them and harass those people. I imagine that's very unpleasant for them. I wish they'd stop for everyone's sake.

So anyway, my point is this: It's bad! I stayed polite the whole time, acting completely kind, because to me it matters what people think of me (to an unhealthy point, but that's a separate issue). These people are willfully destroying their potential customer base. Nobody who's been hung up on by a company is going to go back later and say "Hey, what was that company again? I think I'll check them out." Maybe they could change their flowchart - "End every call with 'Okay, but if you ever need X in the future, think of Teletronic Industries!'" Not that I'd deal with a company that telemarketed me in the first place, but the odds are better at least. The irony is that it didn't matter what he thought of me. He wasn't going to buy games from me, and I would never interact with him on the street. I just personally didn't want to be thought of as a jerk. He had no such qualms. It's a nasty world.

One last more specific note: When I said "No, I don't want a new merchant account, thanks" (nevermind that it would take weeks to change over!), he explained to me that he wasn't offering me that. He was trying to give me a free service of comparing how much money I pay now with what I'd pay on his service. Think that one through a minute - I rejected his product without even knowing how much or little it was and yet somehow I would be interested in spending my time discussing what the differences were. Now obviously, what he really means is "let me convince you by showing you how much better ours is", but that's not what he said. He said no, here's a free service, don't you want the free service? Which is moronatronic! That's like sitting around discussing whether Superman or Batman would win in a fight (Superman - he's literally invincible. Unless Batman gets a piece of kryptonite, in which case Superman is absolutely helpless. Not a very interesting fight either way) - it just doesn't matter and it's a waste of time! And it's not even fun like discussing superhero matchups might be.
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